Saturday, October 22, 2005

only a moron wags the dog twice

Bush Calls for U.N. Action Against Syria
President Bush on Friday said the U.N. should deal quickly and seriously with a report implicating Syria in the assassination of Lebanon's former prime minister, a killing that led to protests and withdrawal of Syrian troops from Lebanon after nearly 30 years as overlord.
"The report strongly suggests that the politically motivated assassination could not have taken place without Syrian involvement," Bush said.
The United Nations investigative report, which Bush called "deeply disturbing," made a link between high-ranking Syrian officials and their Lebanese allies in the car bombing that killed Rafik Hariri and 20 others in February.

So then, sir president, dipping into the playbook for one more Hail Mary Pass?

Current events got you down? Worried that that Patrick Fitzgerald just put up a vanity website? Cheney having trouble with the ol' ticker?

Let's start a freakin' war then, eh?

Ann Coulter hates the house lawyer you nominated for the highest court in the land. Weird. And now Poppie's friends are gangbanging you in the liberal media!

The justification for the previous war is set to crumble -- let's start dropping bombs!

Oh, and the domestic economy? Click your ruby slippers together three times and say "holy fucking shit we're screwed," and perhaps the stock market won't crash until 2006.

I'd say you've spent your political capital, and switched to credit. I'd say the well has gone dry.

Stay stupid, baby. Who loves yah.


"Kinky Sex Makes The World Go 'Round"

Greetings:This is the Secretary of War at the State Department
of the United States
We have a problem.
The companies want something done about this sluggish
world economic situation
Profits have been running a little thin lately
and we need to stimulate some growth
Now we know
there's an alarmingly high number of young people roaming
around in your country with nothing to do but stir up trouble
for the police and damage private property.
It doesn't look like they'll ever get a job
It's about time we did something constructive with these people
We've got thousands of 'em here too. They're crawling all over
The companies think it's time we all sit down, have a serious get-together-
And start another war
The President?
He loves the idea!

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